Brother to Brother

I wrote about "the talk" (sex) the other day but there's another important talk that little Black boys get that's equally important. There isn't really a name for it, it's just the "what it means to be a Black man" talk. You hear little snippets of it all the time when you're young: "A Black man gotta work twice as hard to get half as far." In my mind, that was just the pledge of allegiance for the old men at the barbershop. A lot of the people in my grandmother's neighborhood were White and everyone at my mother's job was White and all of them were nice and friendly towards me. Then I hit puberty.

Now I won't lie and say that those people treated me differently, because they didn't. What did change was the way I was approached by strangers. Pre-puberty everyone greets you like your some kind of chocolate cherubim. Post puberty, you're a threat. I started growing a mustache when I was ten. I couldn't understand why people crossed the street when they saw me coming or quickly looked the other way whenever I made eye contact. Most importantly, I couldn't understand why the police always slowed down when they passed me and would shine the light on me.

Luckily my elementary school sent the guys to the "Brother to Brother" conference at Howard University. It was a one day "Intro to being a Black man." They explained the crime rate, the hard facts that most crime in DC is committed by us and that with puberty comes the unfortunate fact that you now fit the description of every suspect in the city. They talked to us about how to talk to police. Be respectful and answer their questions and whatever you do, don't run away or make sudden movements towards your pockets. Be conscious of your surroundings and don't walk too close or too fast near women, especially White women after dark.There were other things discussed that day like going to college and setting goals, avoiding crime and gangs, but the thing about the cops and walking behind women stuck with me the most.

It would all prove useful in the months ahead. That's it for today class. Tomorrow we'll examine the hilarious tale of Ordale's first few experiences nearly being arrested by the police.