Scene It.

Sorry for being MIA the last few days. Someone important was in the hospital and I had to go stand guard for a few days.

The whole thing has me down, so I tried to cheer myself up by watching a movie. What the hell is up with movies these days?  I rented The Incredible Burt Wonderstone on the completely misguided logic that between Jim Carrey, Steve Buschemi, and Steve Carrell at least one of them would make me laugh. How about NO, Scott? (Ten points for getting the Austin Powers reference)

Remember when movies were worth sneaking to go see? The good Lord blessed me with a 30 year old's facial hair back in elementary school, but not with his height. Hell, I'm 31 and still don't have a 30 year old's height, but that's another story. I remember going to great lengths to sneak into an R rated movie. Either I'd wear my suit to the theater and put my church usher's badge on before I got to the ticket counter in order to sell my age and honesty, or I'd just buy and adult and child ticket and then take one of them back later for a refund.

Then of course there was "my friend" who used to spend the whole day at the movies off just one ticket. He'd check the paper for the show times as well as the running times and then map out the best strategy to see 3-4 movies in a day without missing any part of the films. Weird guy.

But today? I couldn't name a single movie out today worth sneaking into. Hell most of them don't even rank on the suckitude scale from back in the day:

1. I'll wait for it to come out at the dollar movie (six months)


2. I'll wait for it to come out on tape (a year)


3. I'll wait for it to come on cable (a year + change)


4. I'll wait for it to come on TV (it doesn't matter because you don't want to see it)

Burt Wonderstone, and just about every other movie I've seen lately falls on the rarely seen #5:
Yeah, there's something on that tape, but you can tape your stories on that one if you want.

If this were the 90s, that tape would have scotch tape over the back so fast (Sadly, the average kid these days won't get that reference). The movie isn't even worth describing. Stuff happened for 45 minutes. I laughed once. I turned it off once I saw that it had another hour to go.

Maybe I'm just getting old and I've seen so many movies at this point that they've lost their appeal. I don't buy it, but it's possible. I just miss the old days when all of my friends would leave school at the same time to hurry and get to Union Station or City Place in time to catch the twilight show before the price went from $4.00 to what we thought was outrageous back then, $6.50.

Nowadays...I'll wait for it to come to Redbox.