- My daughter is an asshole
- My daughter can't act
- My daughter can scrap
Apparently the other padawans were building a tower of blocks. My daughter stood back and watched them. Now me, being her father, would've immediately become suspicious, but the daycare people have been trained to be optimistic when it comes to children. Eighteen seconds is the current world record for my daughter to stand still in a room full of toys without having a hidden agenda.
Anyway, the kids got their tower to whatever height is impressive for three year olds. It was at that moment when my daughter...you already know where this story is going. No need to build suspense. So the three year olds are standing around their fallen tower, all searching for the toddler way to convey, "What the fuck, dude?" My daughter is standing there giggling, and the teachers have to go over and look authority-like.
They, being optimistic, try to explain to her how feelings, emotions and disappointment work. Hoping for her next Oscar, my daughter looks around on the floor until she finds the mat and then thrusts herself down. She then looks up to see if anyone is watching. When she gets no response, she stands back up and does it again...you know, in case they missed it the first time.
As if they're in a real movie, everyone in the room decides to do another take of the scene: The kids rebuild their tower, the teachers give my daughter the benefit of the doubt, and she stands there as they get ready to complete their tower. Then she smiles, knocks that shit over, and starts laughing again.
The teachers were clear to point out to me that she wasn't trying to intentionally hurt their feelings. They recognized that it seemed as if the kids were entertainment to her. She found their reactions funny, and thus decided to do it again. It sounds like the motivation of all cartoon villains, but it's not really news to me. I still maintain that my daughter can probably read and speak a few languages. She's just figured out how to play all of us. As I like to say all of the time, "But they were all of them deceived."
So anyway, I don't know if this was related to the tower or not, but there's a little boy in the class who is a few inches taller than her. That's saying a lot, because my daughter is one of the biggest kids in the class even though they're all about a year older than her. So Ivan Drago is standing toe to toe with my daughter on the mat. The way that the teacher's described the height difference, my daughter must've been staring at his throat or something. All of a sudden, she tackled him to the ground. This apparently happens often.
Once again, they were clear to point out that she didn't seem to be trying to hurt him. "It wasn't revenge for anything. She wasn't angry. She seems to have been playing with him." I just sat there and kept trying to think of something sad or depressing to keep from laughing. The teachers laughed, but I didn't know if that was a test to see how bad of a parent I am. I just tried to look disappointed. It probably came across more like I had gas or something.
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