Shoot for the Clouds...Not the Moon or Stars

I came across these a while back and thought they were funny as hell. These are actual toys and I hope that no one ever buys my daughter these:

First on the list of "Set Your Sights Low:"

Baby's First Workstation

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Enjoy that lemonade stand now son, because it's as close to entrepreneurship that you're gonna get. Yeah, you'll spend four years in college and another two in grad school just to become a number. No falling asleep now...you'll have plenty of time for that when you're an adult.

If $2500 isn't in your price range then perhaps your kid will do better with one of these...

Baby's First Cleaning Cart

[caption id="attachment_487" align="aligncenter" width="500" caption="Hotel Sold Separately"][/caption]

Just when you thought the sky was the limit...in comes the glass ceiling. The offensiveness of this toy was spared thanks to the nice non-minority baby modeling the toy. If this had been a Hispanic baby, then people would be outraged. Who are we kidding though, you have to know somebody to get a job cleaning offices. So this brings us to the final toy on our Lowered Expectations Christmas List...

Baby's First McJob

[caption id="attachment_488" align="aligncenter" width="540" caption="You want pride with that?"][/caption]

Let's face it, this is the best some of our kids will ever do. Why drive yourself crazy with twelve years worth of report card pep talks when you can just accept your kid's fate today? It is a tad bit ironic that the McDonald's toy is cheaper than the cleaning cart which is cheaper than the cubicle...it's as if they're appealing to certain classes with their price structure.