“The things we own end up owning us. It’s only after you lose everything that you’re free to do anything.”
-Fight Club
Do you hate your job? Do you fantasize about turning in your notice every single day? Do you come back down to earth and realize that you really can’t go anywhere right now? If so, then welcome to my post!
I’m writing this because I can’t find anything like it anywhere online. Last year I worked as a manager in a call center in Durham, NC. My wife and I had a combined income of over $100k. All of our needs were met and we had plenty of disposable income. For two kids with humble beginnings, we were doing alright. By humble, I mean poor. Strangely enough, we were miserable!
I thought something was wrong with me. I searched the internet looking for other people who felt that way but Google never brought up anything. Apparently no one fell in my category. I just can’t believe that I’m the only person who had a good job, wasn’t happy because it was a bad job fit and despite all of the money, felt the need to quit and start over.
I watched Fight Club one night and heard that quote (the one that’s the title of the post) and used it as confirmation to get the hell out of dodge. I realized that while I had no clue what I wanted to do with my life, I was hurting myself by staying in the same situation. I wanted to move to DC and live in a real city. I wanted to try a different career or go back to college or…ANYTHING!
Growing up broke, you hear a lot of people with money complain that money doesn’t buy happiness. I wanted to slap a lot of those people as a child. Money seems like the key to happiness when you’re poor. To grow up and become the person who would throw all of that away seemed crazy to me, but I had to reconcile within myself one fact: Money has no value but what we give it.
Money is something that we trade in exchange for something else. We all know this, but a lot of times we only consider that fact from the stand point of already having it. Yeah, it’s common sense that you trade your dollar for a peice of candy in the store. What we don’t realize is what we traded in order to get the dollar in the first place.
If you are like me and worked a job that was somewhat brain-dead, then you know what I mean. Now, I don’t mean that being a manager doesn’t require a brain. What I mean is: In lower level management, you are often just a mediator between upper management and the front-line employees. You are not there to make decisions. You are simply there to report back to the front line and then to take their concerns to upper level management. Any decisions you make are probably based on an interpretation of company policy, not your own thoughts on the matter.
With all of that said, my job could have been done by the big magic hat from Harry Potter. So I was trading my time in exchange for money. Some people can operate in a job like that. I couldn’t. I need a job that trades me money for my creativity, my intelligence and my knowledge. If I don’t have the existing skills that someone would pay for, then I need to go out and get them…at least that’s how I felt at the time.
The only reason I stayed at my job as long as I did was because I’d never made that much money before. No one in my family had. Once I made it, I bought a car, rented a nice house and started a lifestyle that cost money to maintain. When I wanted to find a better job that had more intrinsic value, I couldn’t bring myself to leave because I knew I’d have to give up one of those things that I wanted. The things that I owned were starting to own me.
I can’t tell any of you what to do, but I will say this much: If you find yourself in that situation, please take inventory of your life. Every person has a price. Money should never be compensation for unhappiness. Your time is the most valuable resource that you have. Once it is gone, it can never be replaced. In the end, you will miss the things you didn’t do…you probably won’t miss the money.
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